Grief

The death of a loved one doesn't end your relationship. It changes it from a physical one to a spiritual one. It's all about love.

Do you find yourself crying when you pass your loved one's favorite food in the grocery store? Are you afraid you'll never stop crying, or do you find yourself unable to cry? Do you feel like you will never be happy again? Do your emotions go up and down, depressed one day, angry the next, and perhaps a little better the next? Does this make you think you must be crazy?

If you are in a state of deep grief, you are not crazy. You are normal. In grief your emotions are so intense and sometimes so changeable that you can think you have lost your mind. But you haven't. You are grieving.

The death of your loved one is one of the most intensely painful things that can ever happen to you.  It can leave you reeling and gasping for breath. It has been likened to having a limb amputated, but sometimes it can feel more like it's your heart that has been removed. Traditional grief therapy is very valuable after the death of a loved one. You may also elect to have a Repair & Reattachment Grief Therapy session, which can cut through a great deal of suffering in a much shorter time.

Our relationships are never perfect, and when a person dies, there are usually things we regret. Along with our grief, we may feel angry at the person who died or hurt when we remember things they said or did. We may feel angry at ourselves, angry at God, or angry at the doctors, or anxious about the future without that person. These feelings might not seem rational, but they are normal.

Anger, hurt, guilt, and fear are not the only feelings you can have. We usually have intense feelings of sadness and perhaps despair. Sometimes, part of us can even feel a certain degree of relief. We may have all these feelings and more all at the same time! This crazy combination of conflicting feelings can cause us to question our own sanity, but it is normal.

There are some kinds of deaths that result in what is called disenfranchised grief, or grief that is not publicy recognized or validated. Examples include miscarriage, stillbirth, abortion, death of a same-sex partner, death of a person in prison or who is mentally ill or who has servere dementia. In these cases, people are often not well supported in their grief. Sometimes they feel they cannot even mention that they are in grief, but all forms of grief are deserving of compassion and support.

Fortunately, human beings have an inner blueprint for health. You are programmed to heal, even though in the thick of grief it doesn't seem like it. It can be very hard to relinquish your pain, because it sometimes feelis that the pain keeps you connected to your loved one. Often a person in the depths of grief doesn't even want to heal for fear of losing that connection.

You can recover, however, and stay connected in a profound way at the same time. Although your life will be different, equilirium, peace, and joy can be yours again, and you can maintain your connection with your loved one forever.  I am available to walk you and support you through your pain while you regain your balance, and it is my honor to do so. I will not flinch from your pain.  When you feel ready, you may also choose to participate in a process called Repair & Reattachment Grief Therapy for deeper healing and a direct sense of connection with your loved one. (For more information on this process, click Here)